Sex. Uff, even typing it makes me pause. For so many of us, especially mujeres raised in Latinx households, it wasn’t just “the talk” — it was a threat, a warning, a scarlet letter. You could be the most “good girl” in the room and still get labeled sucia.

That’s why Episode 8 of Listen, Mija hit different. We weren’t out here trying to be sex educators, just three mujeres talking honestly about what it means to own our sexuality when we were taught to fear it. And if I’m honest? It felt like we were talking as much to our daughters as we were to ourselves.

Learning to Talk Without Blushing

I gotta give Jen credit — she pushed past her blushes in this one. Me? I realized I still stumble. I laugh, I deflect, I shrink. Even though my so-called “hoe phase” is no secret to my circle, there are pieces of my story I still keep tucked away.

But here’s the thing: that phase was never just about sex. It was about intimacy, trust, learning to listen to my body. Some nights were messy, some were magic, but all of it shaped who I am now — and who I chose to love long-term.

Owning It (Without OnlyFans Confidence)

If there was one heartbeat in our convo, it was this: own your sexuality. Not in the way Instagram tells us to. Not in the way men demand we should. Just in our way.

Yes, we laughed about orgasms and what we like in bed. But when it came to things like nudes or OnlyFans? The truth–none of us have that level of confidence. And honestly? Sometimes I envy the mujeres who do. Owning your sexuality that boldly takes a courage I’m still building.

Where We Clash: Opposite-Sex Friendships

And then there was the whole debate about friendships with men. Stella’s convinced they rarely exist without someone catching feelings. Me? I call BS. I’ve had multiple opposite-sex friendships that never crossed that line — just great vibes, lots of laughs, and in some cases, they’ve become family. They’ve held me up. To erase that possibility feels too limiting, too black-and-white for the real world we live in. To suggest women should only be friends with gay men feels dismissive of how expansive love and loyalty can be.

What We Didn’t Go Deep Enough On

If I could go back, I’d push us to talk more about healing. Because sexual liberation isn’t just about freedom — it’s about wholeness. For me, dating and intimacy came when I was healthier in my body and soul, when I was in the middle of a spiritual journey. Yes, I got side-eyed in my small-group Bible study. But I also knew my choices weren’t reckless — they were aligned with the version of myself that was growing stronger.

And that’s important to name: there’s a difference between liberation that comes from self-love and attention-seeking that comes from emptiness. One is medicine, the other is a wound.

Why I’m Writing This Here

So why am I bringing Episode 8 into this corner of Art & Sol? Because this blog has always been about more than just vibes and aesthetics — it’s about naming the messy, beautiful truths that make us whole.

For me, that includes unpacking the shame, the silence, the sucia labels that never really fit but still stuck to our skin. A conversation like what we had was a reminder that shame loses its grip when we tell the truth out loud. And maybe by writing it here, someone else sees themselves and feels a little less alone.

Your Turn

What’s your story with intimacy and shame? Did you grow up fearing sex, or are you learning to reclaim it now? Have you ever felt shame or freedom in how you own your sexuality? What shaped your perspective? Drop your thoughts in the comments — or better yet, listen to the full episode and join the conversation.

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